Weekdays

I'm back to my "rest" weekends again! One - because my weekend mates have been busy. Two - trying to save up some money. Three - really need some rest.

So last weekend I was stuck in my room to do nothing. It was kind of lame I know, and impractical since I whine about how unorganized my life is right now and all that messed up life dilemma.

The art of doing nothing is my greatest, number one, guilty pleasure. I'm so good at wasting time. It may sound very repulsive, yes? But it calms me down. I think there would be some kind of world peace if people just sat for a day and think about things that make them grin.

Ok enough of my nonsense string of calming thoughts. I'm going to stay here, in my room today. I ain't gonna comb my hair, cause ain't going anywhere... hoohoo

Weekdays

I actually can't complain about this week.

Monday, I had dinner with Miko, Erika, and Ate Mariko. "I missed Miko" is an understatement. We're too far from each other sometimes, communicating with her through mobile and the internet is not enough. I miss laughing by the mere sight of our facial expressions.

You know when I say I miss college, a part of it will always come from missing Kumiko. Always.

It's such a great bonus that Erika joined us for the night. It could never go wrong with these two. They are two of those people who make me laugh even I've had the shittiest day. They make me want to laugh, they make you want to try to crack a joke, because they make me not want to waste the time I have with them. It's comforting.

Being nostalgic and all, I dug deep into Kumiko's multiply account and found old pictures. I have to blog separately about that though. She already posted a blog about it. Lovely!

Tuesday, I never get to go home early when I promise myself to do so. Meeting up with Jervi got cancelled because he said he had to go somewhere. Maybe meet boys lol. I ended up having the usual after office routine. Dinner, coffee and pretzels. We got to redeem the free pretzels from Joy. Yay! They were telling me I am becoming one of their topics because I was MIA for a few days haha so I had to spend some time with them. TO RANT of course. :)

Wednesday, Sir Benjie's despidida. Well, no details on that. One thing is for sure though, it was fun. I was not able to join Jervi, Pao and Erika though. I couldn't leave the office even if I tried. I got a call from a drunk Erika who passed the phone to a drunk Paola who then passed it to another drunk, cussing Jervi. Haha what a nice lullaby before I sleep!

Thursday, is just kadlhvfailwuo;wfrw. Since I had to pass the previous night, we agreed to hang out after office on a Thursday. We went to Fort Agave, because of Pao haha. I was pissed off at first because they can't decide where to go, if they're going to pick me up, and to add some more stress they were late. I was hungry and anxious. Finally when we arrived, we ordered and had small talks that involved Pao and Jervi's bickering. And then I turned to face Pao. And on the background I saw you. Oh my, freaking heavens. I saw you. After, I'm guessing, nine years? Wow you still look the same. Still beautiful if I my say. Gad, I sound like a creeper.

I. just. can't. even. I looked so wasted. Darn it. But it didn't bother me much. I was a little surprised to see you. I don't think this comes from mainly or entirely having a big crush on you waaaay back when I was just starting adolescence. It's just that somehow, I came to realize I kind of looked up to you. You were different from all the people I knew back then - smart, kind, I don't really know you but I can imagine what kind of culture you got. Ok I'll just breathe and stop creeping out. LOL

Friday, is HARRY POTTER day! I'm not a fan and I'm a little lost, well most of the time. Didn't read the books, haven't even watched the movies (well except the last two) but I can say I liked it. Pma was crying haha we were all for saving her tears too but Ayee told me to shut up because it was the serious and important part of the film. Pao got extra junk because they didn't give us popcorn. Boo. They should've compensated by giving us two hotdogs! Anyway, SM North was so packed there were people and cars everywhere. We parked at the empty spot at the Valet parking. In our defense, we searched the place and had circled the block to find the valet booth but to no avail. And then when we got back, no one was there either so we just took off. HAHA

To end the day we had Moonleaf to go.

So yes, I need rest. Today I swear I'm not doing anything, nothing at all!

PS. I'm only quoting Bruno Mars's song because of Edei :p

I can't wait for the day that I would start looking forward to Mondays again

I feel extremely unhappy this weekend. Last Monday I decided not to go to work because

This is getting serious. I don't know how long I could hold up for that fucking job you know? I've waited. And well, I thought I would't have to anymore cause it feels like the deal has been forgotten. I was actually planning to file my resignation last week, or this week at the latest. I even tol a few friends how excited and nervous I am. Then it came again, oh my god, the deal is still freakin on. I know I agreed to this and I am genuinely happy to grand a friend a favor but, this is becoming too much. I mean if thisjob aint a bitch at all I think I could even wait longer but hell it's kinda killing me. Like every time I wake up I expect it to be a bad day unless it's a Friday or Saturday. This week, I had to bring home some papers to finish them at home. I just want my weekend to be peaceful and happy and the thought of work ruins it. In addition, I keep on looking forward to Fridays only since that means not having to go to work the next day. That's just lame! (Oh I look forward to Wednesdays too because new eps of Glee come out here on Wednesdays but that's even a lamer reason. Plus, it's already the finale this week so in reality, I have to scratch Wednesday too.) I feel like my life is being cut short because I'm on autopilot staring Sunday night to Thursday night. I can't even wake up on a Sunday happy.

The only thing that is good about my job is the friendships I've built with my co-workers.

Like when someone tells me I'm lucky that given the high rate of unemployment these days, I have a job, I want to punch him/her in the face.

Most of all, I don't want to suck at work. I may hate it but I don't want to be inefficient. But given how I feel about this job and given the work load that's like close to hell, I don't really know if I can do this smoothly.

I just want to get out and fix my life, explore other possibilities. I want to have time to think. I just pray everything falls into place. I've been waiting for the right time. I don't know how long I could manage to to go all AWOL.

No Title in Mind

What's going on, chicharon?

Lol. I have watched Mikey Bustos vids yesterday and got a bit addicted.

Anyway, I just thought of blogging. These are such crazy, busy days. The heat is almost unbearable. The work load is just pouring and office duties are, sometimes, crushing my bones.

BTW I have gained 20lbs in 3 months. If I was challenged in a reality show to gain weight, it would've been "chicken" to me. Heh.

So, I have no concrete blog flow. This is just a random rambling so please do not think of red marks while reading.

Three of my closest friends graduated this week - Ayee, Erika and Pao. I love them to pieces and I'm so happy we're all in the jungle now lol. I was at Ayee's grad party last night, I wish I had one too :( I got to spend time with Pao and Pma after a long long time! Exponential hearts.

I'm quite sad though, I feel like we should stop referring to Pao and Pma as Pampao. I feel like, despite unwavering public demand, they're not gonna get back together. :((

It's hard having friends you love so dearly break up. Alam mo yun? We're like their fans kaya. Huhu

So much for that. Moving on...

ALFD's lola died. We went to the wake and had a great time. I know it sounds wrong but we did hehe. It's not like we made fun of the wake ok? We just played cards and "gambled" like what old folks do on lamays. It was the first time I went to a wake with just my friends.

Oh life.

It's funny I get so irritated easily by you. Sana babae ka na lang. At sana gusto kita so you'd be my happy crush. Kaso hindeee. Pft.

I really had something to blog about but I can't. Gonna keep it to myself tonight.

Ciao siopao!

The Good Things Over the Bad Ones

So you see, the universe is not so bad after all.

On Family:

My uncle's operation went well. I did not know what to say when I saw him.

A year ago, I bought a bike and asked him to teach me. He went to QC Circle every morning to jog. Waking up early always felt like a punishment for me so I got to go with him only twice. By June, I got a job and thought, "well, maybe some other time".

And then he got sick again. His leg got infected and now, it's gone. I feel deeply sorry for all the mornings I've wasted.

My dad handed his wife the death certificate, she said "kailangan pa ba nito? parang nakakatakot naman". It may sound and look morbid, it may give you goosebumps, signing a death certificate of someone (someone's leg to be exact) who's still alive makes you fear his/her death even more. But it needs to be done.

A part of him died.

He raised his right limb and held on to his thighs. Below his knee was the bondage. And then nothing. It breaks my heart seeing that a part of him died.

Amputation is such a hard way of saving a life. Yet I find relief in the fact that he is still alive. At the end of the day, we are all thankful that he's still fighting with us.

On Work:

Some people put more value in work relationships than work itself. I now find myself in the list of those "some people". I haven't been working for a long time, people might think I don't know anything about office politics and I still have the hang of college optimism, and stuff. You know, that I'm still just a "kid".

Well kids, this is just my humble opinion:

I came to realize that in a work place, ranking is a mere title just as salary is a mere figure; but character - character is the real measure of pride. I stand by people who, I know, are working hard, do not kiss ass, do not act for themselves at the expense of others, do not use their position to pick favorites, to bring down rivals, and to abuse things and people "under their authority". I have seen people do ugly things - things that are unnecessary, unfair, and worse, unethical.

I am just happy that I share bottles of beer with real people.

On Myself:

I still do not know what to do with myself. I still don't have a plan and it scares me. I'm still not an overachiever, or maybe, not yet an achiever at all. Surprisingly though, I am motivated. I think I'm done with the self-pity, I-am-a-meaningless-mediocre-person stage. So yeah, cheers!

On a Lighter Note:

Keep me diverted. I'm enjoying it. :)

We're Just Friends

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Deleted.

Not Just Another Sunday

I'm savouring this moment. I don't know why. I feel like I'm holding on to something. I didn't know holidays and long weekends bring people's emotional side. Haha. Lord, please let me endure the next weeks and months :( Things are getting harder and harder for me to tolerate.

I remember there was a time when I used to hate Sundays. Like after our grocery routine, I feel so bored and drained. I feel like there's nothing else to do blahblah. It was kind of "depressing" I really don't know why. Now, I just realized, after those Sundays were whole weeks of learning in school with friends. It was wonderful.

Work. .

I'm blogging because I feel like I need to already. It's been two weeks since I started working..So there, nothing more to say.

Let me have a cookie.