I sometimes feel I cannot get through this. I still daydream of things with you, or remember happy moments. Then I think about how you think of me - that what I did was ridiculous, stupid, silly. I do not feel respect in those words. Who did not listen to who? It's too late now. I'm too pissed and frustrated. I did it, you did what was for me, the most painful; and you did not mind. Becuase for you it was not wrong. For you. And for him. It was the only thing important. I do not want to play the arguments all over again. You did not want me to leave but things were never the same again. I do not like how you treat me, think of me, talk to me. I cannot think of anything that makes me want to stay near you except the fact that I (you know what). But everytime I think about you I remember what you did, I question why can't you just do whatever would make me forget, why can't you understand that pain cannot be rationalized and all I want is for you to respect the pain you gave me, that I tried to endure. Respeto lang dun sa six years. I just wanted to live without seeing the very cause of my suffering. But you kept on insisting there was nothing wrong. You did me wrong, why should you set the parameters of what I should feel just because you think "there's nothing wrong"
Bottom line is, as what you've said a few weeks ago, it's too late.
I wish you didn't tell me you didn't want me to leave. It made (and perhaps, makes) me think twice. You are that someone. But again, you have your own life now, own plans and priorities. None of which I am a part of. How can I be your person?
That was my favorite picture of us by the way. I wish we could have stayed together, happy like those days. (Ugh. Shut up.)
